How to Cultivate Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence in business consulting

Hi, team! It’s your friend, Mary, with The I in Team series where you can find, be, and build your positive influence. One of the main topics in my weekly conversations with team members and clients is emotional intelligence. They want to learn more about it and develop habits to increase their emotional intelligence abilities. Emotional intelligence encompasses two huge aspects. The first aspect is the self; being able to accurately identify and manage emotions is a key part of emotional intelligence. The second is with others; being able to accurately identify and respond to the emotions another individual is feeling. Some researchers even believe that emotional intelligence, or EI, is more important for leaders and managers in the modern era than IQ. If you’re looking to control your influence, here are some ways to cultivate emotional intelligence.

Self-Evaluation

Before you attempt to understand and respond to others’ emotional states, you must understand your own first. One of the hardest things to do is transparently evaluate yourself with 100% honesty. Something our mind tends to do to protect us is to lie and tell us a story that fits into the reality we want, but these stories don’t serve us in our ability to be truly emotionally intelligent. Instead, challenge yourself. Ask yourself how others may perceive you and your ability to be emotionally intelligent. What might they say? Would you agree with them?

There is no need to judge yourself in this process. Judgment will only hinder your growth, not help it. Instead, evaluate yourself with compassion and try to understand where your emotions come from, what they are triggered by, how often they come up, and if you feel they are appropriate responses to your environment. If you struggle to understand what your emotions are, where they come from, and why, try starting with an emotion wheel. When you feel an emotion, try to correctly categorize it. Doing so will lessen the negative effects of negative emotions as giving a name to something often makes it more manageable. Once you know what the emotion is, consider where it comes from and in what other situations it has presented itself.

Observe and Listen

A key part to emotional intelligence is observing our mind without judgment to better understand where emotions come from, as well as observing how our words, actions, and emotions affect others. To cultivate emotional intelligence in both ourselves and with others, we must slow down, observe, and listen. Those who are emotionally intelligent know how to respond to others who are feeling emotions as well as how to handle their own emotional response to dealing with the situation. They do this by observing, correctly analyzing the emotions, and listening for opportunities to help alleviate the emotional suffering. Conversely, they know when there is nothing they can do to help and call upon their skill of empathy, which will allow them to respond to the situation without creating a barrier.

Those looking to build skills of emotional intelligence should spend twice as much time observing and listening than talking. The more information that is discovered, the easier it will be to respond accurately. The same is true for our own emotions; the more we observe and listen to the emotions we feel—correctly categorizing them—the better we can challenge or have compassion for our own state rather than immediately acting upon them. Again, the better you become at understanding yourself, the easier it will be to observe and listen to others who need you. It’s akin to the classic airplane safety tip: Always put your mask on first before helping others (or always understand your own emotions first before helping others).

Curiosity Over Judgment

Leaders and managers must choose curiosity over judgment when dealing with themselves and their team. Curiosity allows us to explore, ask questions, gain a better understanding, and meet ourselves or the other person where they are in the process. If we immediately chose judgment, we create a barrier between us and what we want to understand. Judgment will always hinder your ability to be emotionally intelligent. In my experience, judgment tends to come from a place where we don’t feel good about ourselves, so we project that onto others (or ourselves) as a means to alleviate our stress without self-reflecting on what is truly wrong.

Conversely, choosing curiosity is a form of emotional intelligence in that we accept that not everyone is perfect, and we continue to want to respond in a way that is helpful. When we have curiosity for ourselves and others, it becomes easier to explore the complexities of emotions as we train ourselves to want to explore them. If you are used to judging yourself and others, you will need to challenge yourself to grow the habit of being curious and asking questions. In doing so, you may find that your own stress is alleviated as this tends to help soften the judgment of ourselves.

Self-Awareness

Perhaps the largest component of cultivating emotional intelligence is self-awareness, but self-awareness doesn’t come out of nowhere. It takes patience, observation, and curiosity to develop awareness of oneself. You must become aware of your emotions, how they feel in your body when they arise, how you respond to them, and how you project them into the world. But your self-awareness doesn’t end with your emotions.

To be truly emotionally intelligent, you must be wholly self-aware. You must understand your strengths and weaknesses, your preferred communication style, how big your tank of willpower is, what leads you to burnout, and so much more. Self-awareness is born out of transparent self-evaluation. The more truthful you are, the more self-aware you will become.

If you wish to cultivate emotional intelligence because it is something that doesn’t come naturally to you, the key will be to have compassion for yourself. This is not an easy process, but it is worth it. Only you have the power to control your mind and change the way you see and respond to the world. In doing so, you will not be perfect. The most emotionally intelligent individuals understand that imperfection is part of the human condition, and it is having compassion for yourself and others that allows us to enter a world of true emotional intelligence. Controlling the mind is a journey and one that must be forgiving. Always choose curiosity over judgment and continue showing yourself compassion as you grow.

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How to Mitigate Financial Risk Using the S.M.A.R.T. Management System

June 9, 2025

In an increasingly volatile economy, businesses cannot afford to be reactive when it comes to their finances. Whether you're a startup founder, a growing enterprise, or a seasoned business owner, the risk of financial instability is real—and growing. At IA Business Advisors, we help companies proactively navigate these risks using our comprehensive S.M.A.R.T. Management System . S.M.A.R.T. is more than just a goal-setting acronym. It is a decision-making and execution framework that brings clarity, structure, and alignment to every part of your business. From six-week action plans to one-year targets and long-term strategy, S.M.A.R.T. ensures your financial operations support healthy growth and resilience. Understanding Financial Risk in Today’s Business Climate Financial risk is multifaceted. It ranges from cash flow disruptions and market shifts to internal mismanagement and over-leveraged growth. As Brian Smith shared on a recent Daily Influence podcast episode, unchecked growth can drive a company into bankruptcy. Scaling without intention—chasing fast growth without aligning the internal team and financial resources—leads to diluted communication, quality issues, and operational chaos. Mitigating financial risk begins by understanding that more revenue doesn't always equal more stability. True sustainability comes from building systems that support intentional, well-paced growth. The S.M.A.R.T. Framework in Action: Reducing Financial Risk Our S.M.A.R.T. Management System guides businesses in creating resilient, financially stable operations through: 1. Specific: Build with Intentionality Clarity is power. One of our podcast guests, Mike Heatwole (CEO of The Dala Group), emphasized the importance of sitting down to define what matters most—whether that’s paying down debt, investing in growth, or launching a new venture. When your financial goals are specific, your strategy becomes targeted and less prone to reactive decision-making. “If we don’t know what the goal is, how do we get there?” — Mike Heatwole, CEO of The Dala Group 2. Measurable: Track What Matters Many companies are blindsided not by invisible risks, but by unmonitored ones. We help clients implement tools to track cash flow, margin fluctuations, and budget variances in real time. Visibility into your financial health gives you the power to respond early and course correct as needed. 3. Achievable: Assign Financial Stewardship Risk is reduced when financial responsibility is distributed. Through teamwide financial literacy and clear accountability, we empower organizations to make stronger daily decisions. No individual person should carry the entire burden—and no key area should go unmonitored. 4. Relevant: Make Risk Management a Habit Quarterly or biannual financial health check-ins create a sustainable rhythm. These don’t have to be complicated—they just need to be consistent. Regular reviews embed risk awareness into your company culture and decision-making process. 5. Timely: Foster Honest Dialogue Financial silence is a hidden threat. As Brian noted on the podcast, emotions like fear or shame can prevent businesses from facing financial realities. We encourage honest, blame-free communication around financial performance, creating space for solutions and collective action. Case in Point: Short-Term Action, Long-Term Impact One of our clients, a family-run distribution company, had strong revenue but was bleeding cash due to aging receivables. Together, we built a six-week S.M.A.R.T. Plan focused on accounts receivable recovery. We implemented weekly check-ins, assigned ownership, and used real-time tracking. Within 90 days, their outstanding A/R dropped by 22%, freeing up capital and restoring operational confidence. It’s Never Too Late to Get Financially Intentional Many leaders in their 40s, 50s, or 60s worry they’ve waited too long. But as Mike Heatwole wisely shared: “It’s never too late. Just get started. Do something.” Progress—not perfection—is the goal. Start small. Build momentum. Take the next best step. This mirrors a concept we love from The Gap and The Gain by Dan Sullivan: measure progress based on how far you've come, not just how far you have to go. Final Thoughts: Make Financial Stability a Strategy Mitigating financial risk isn’t about a dramatic overhaul. It’s about consistent action, visibility, and intentional decision-making. With the S.M.A.R.T. Management System, IA Business Advisors helps businesses turn risk into clarity, fear into focus, and instability into opportunity. If you’re ready to start, we’re ready to help. Let’s have a conversation about what matters most to you—and build from there.

Enhancing Interpersonal Relationships for Toxic Workplace Recovery

May 29, 2025

Hello, team! Mary here, continuing our journey through the I in Team series, where we challenge and empower you to Find , Be , and Build Your Influence. One of the most common things we’re asked to help our clients with is toxic workplace recovery. This directly connects to the culture of the team, and while rebuilding that culture takes time and intention, it is absolutely possible. In fact, with the guidance of our I in Team approach and S.M.A.R.T. Management system, we’ve successfully helped more than 19,000 teams evolve into high-performing, values-based cultures. If you’re ready to take the lead and breathe life back into your team, we’re here and ready to support you. Practice Emotional Intelligence One of the most impactful steps you can take on your toxic workplace recovery journey is to practice emotional intelligence (the ability to recognize, understand, and manage both your own emotions and the emotions of those around you). Toxic environments are often the result of emotional disconnection, poor communication, unnecessary competition, and a culture that avoids constructive feedback. Begin by shifting your perspective: respond with empathy, ask thoughtful questions, and use “I” statements. These habits model two traits, emotional regulation and empathy, that influence how your team interacts and solves problems. Start small. For example, set a personal goal to give one piece of sincere praise or recognition per day. This is a S.M.A.R.T. goal, and it starts to reinforce positive emotional exchanges. Over time, this contributes to a psychologically safe environment where people feel seen and supported. Foster Open Communication Once emotional intelligence begins to take root, toxic workplace recovery is just around the corner. Open communication becomes more natural because when team members are aware of their own and others’ emotions, communication becomes seamless. The number one rule? Listen. Really listen. Without listening, communication is incomplete. Try implementing monthly influence partnerships—team pairings that rotate so members can get to know each other beyond surface-level roles. This creates connection and, when done with consistency (Timely), fosters trust across your team. Another way to build open communication is by creating a structured feedback loop. Clarify how and when feedback should be given—perhaps during weekly one-on-ones or monthly review meetings—and make sure all team members understand the difference between criticism and constructive feedback. S.M.A.R.T. feedback is Specific and Relevant, and when delivered with respect, it encourages team members to grow without fear. Lead by Example As we say throughout the I in Team series, everyone is a leader regardless of title. Whether you’re in the C-suite or just starting your first job, how you show up directly shapes the culture of your team. To begin, set some respectful boundaries rooted in your values. Let others know what you need to succeed and what behaviors support or disrupt your work. When disagreements arise, demonstrate what respectful disagreement looks like—calm, focused on solutions, and free from personal attacks. If your workplace has leaned into competition, shift the focus to collaboration. Collaborate on micro-goals, like shared tasks or cross-functional projects. Make the results Measurable and celebrate wins together (publicly, if possible). Consider S.M.A.R.T.-based team-building events (like problem-solving challenges or goal-setting workshops) to reinforce collaboration in a meaningful way. Final Thoughts Toxic workplace recovery starts with you. Every interaction, every word, every moment of listening is a chance to model what’s possible. Show up the way you want others to show up. If your team is struggling to rebuild or you need expert guidance, reach out . We’re here to help. Let’s keep influencing responsibly and positively together.